Saturday, September 29, 2012

Whats around the bend?

I can still feel the soft breeze on my face, the sound of horse hooves, the rhythm of my mount under me. I can see my shinny black faithful dog running happily ahead of me and my short corgi following so close behind the horse's hooves you would think he might get kicked, but he never did. These were fun days of running across meadows, singing at the top of my lungs with only the wild critters to hear me. There were hours spent dreaming, exploring and being free. I would take to the trail and no one really knew where I was headed. Most of the time I didn't even know. Often I rode onto new ground, the road calling me farther and farther.

 The bend, there was always a bend up ahead. I always longed for reaching it and seeing what lay around it's corner. Dusk might be settling, I may have something else to do and still I would long to reach that bend. Sometimes, I would forget to look around me, my eyes, fixed ahead. I would often miss a deer standing quietly by or the way the light sparkled through the trees or even some delicious berries growing along the path. In my quest for the unknown, I would miss the present. I would miss the beauty that was right there in the moment for me to enjoy.

 You know, once I reached the bend, I rounded it's corner only to find another bend ahead, another mystery that was just up there, just a little out of my reach. Sometimes I would go that little ways further around that bend to see the next and yet sometimes I would have to turn around and head back. I was left wondering what lay just ahead, just where I could not tread. Would I remember this spot? Could I come back and go a little further, Sometimes yes and sometimes no.

 Now years later, my life has moved on from that place and that time. Sometimes I would like to go back, but you can't go back. Most times I want to keep moving forward, I long for seeing around each bend that life has ahead. I want to see what lays on the other side. I strain, often I am not content to slowly walk ahead and I try to run. I want to rush because I know that one day something better is around one of these bends and one day I will find it.

 Life is strange. We only have the present. The now. Yet, few live in the now. Most like me, are either looking ahead or looking back. Why is it so hard to live right here, right now, where we are? There is so much beauty right here, right where I am. The wind, it is lovely when it blows through the rice fields. The many women with their pregnant bellies and new babies, new life is all around. New hopes and new dreams are literally being born most everyday where I live. It is beautiful. But I am too often busy, busy looking at my next bend. I want to be there I want to round the next corner. I strain. This straining does not help me make it to the bend quicker. No. It only makes the present take longer and not only that it steals the blessings, the beauty of the present away and instead inserts a restless spirit that steals joy. It takes what could be gifts and turns them into curses. In straining to make it to the next bend I miss out on life, the life God has for me right here, right now.

 I am challenged. To see beauty right here, right now. To see the good things that God has for me now, today. I am challenged to live in joy, to live in love right now, today, in this very minute. To soak in each family I am blessed to serve through midwifery. To enjoy a house full of godly women that all have a heart to serve God and all the many other wonderful things that are right here, right now. Yes. Yes indeed God has beautiful things in this moment and I can trust Him to have beautiful things in the future. Let me not rush ahead and miss this moment.

 "LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance." Psalm 16:5-6

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Not always fun

Every birth is a miracle. Every baby a blessing. But not every birth is fun for the midwife. A lot of mothers that have had a few babies like to do things their own way, which is great. Most of the time. It does make it difficult to do your job as a midwife however. For example: "Here is some water." "no thank you mam." "You have not had any since last night." "no thank you mam". "Why don't you go try to void" "Later mam" "you have not voided, in 4+ hrs, it can prevent the baby's head from coming down." "later mam". And on and on it goes.

This particular mother's last baby had a really fast pushing stage. She expected that to happen with this one and it didn't. You can't reason with a laboring woman very well and sometimes your attempts to help get a "just leave". These are the times you have to love, support,  pray and not take it personal.

The baby did come, in only about 20 minutes once the mom got down to pushing. She did a great job, even if she wouldn't do a thing we said, thankfully there was no major reason for her to need to listen to us (through it would have made it better for her). Her husband was fabulous and did whatever she wished. I again had the pleasure of seeing a squirmy baby boy meet his momma for the very first time. I love that part of my job, always :)


Thankful Thursday


Thursday, September 13, 2012

Thankful Thursday

Today I am thankful for the wonderful birthday package my mom & dad sent me that I picked up at the postoffice this afternoon. Thank you mom & dad, I love it :) 


In my package was an especially wonderful thing - homemade dried strawberries! YUM! I love dried strawberries for many reasons. For one, they are simply delicious :) They remind me of hot summer days chopping strawberries & eating strawberry shortcake,  they remind me of being a kid and filling up the big homemade, fun, one of a kind painted food dehydrator & they remind me of my parents giving heart, because it takes a lot of work to dry them and I know was not a good strawberry year. Yay for yummy wonderful dried strawberries and thanks again mom & dad! 

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Thankful Thursday - a day late

Honestly, I have not been feeling very thankful. Often times I wonder why it is so easy to point out the things that I am not thankful for. 

* I am tried pretty much all the time.

* My dog that is spayed is attracting every male dog in the area.

* My tummy hurt almost all last week.

* I have ring worm on my arm.

* A headache ALL day today.

* I think I failed my last test....

The list could go on and on. I am just having trouble feeling thankful. But really there are many wonderful things to be thankful for:


* My new housemate Aisling had lots of chocolate mailed over that she forces me to eat. 

* I have a comfy bed to rest my weary self in. 

* I have internet access, so I am not as lonely for friends & family

* God loves me ALL the time!

* There is a cool breeze in the evenings 

* I can drink a nice cup of tea in the mornings (or anytime that I want for that matter) 



This list can go on and on too. For some reason it is just harder to think about the lovely things of life. Today I am thankful for the fact there is always something to be thankful for. The tiniest smile, a kind word, the voice of a friend from far away.... always something :) 




Saturday, September 1, 2012

Five beautiful August baby girls

Gwenyth Elise Born at 11:15am on August 2 2012 



Sharmaine born at 1:35am on August 13th 2012


Angelic born at 2:02pm on August 24th 2012




Shekainah Jhun born at 1:08am on August 28th 2012



Jhea Pearl Klarisa born at 4:01am on August 31st 2012